Driven To Tears

The rumours of my demise have been.. wrong. It would be nice to make up some excuse about how I’ve been working long hours with no time to post, but that’s lying. I’ve been coming home to crash and either play Guitar Hero or watch television, for the most part. Apologies.

The good news is I’m loving the job so far. Elements of it seem odd, and I’ve never worked for such a large company with such established ways of doing business. Oddly, nobody in the entire marketing department – comprising half a floor – seems to have more than 18 months tenure, including an average of three months or so in my direct group. What that likely means is that the flow of ideas that should have taken place hasn’t, and I’m somewhat free to be creative and do things my way within reason. I’ll detail more of what goes on as time goes forward.
In other news, I present some rules of the road I’ve earned in my first 12 days of driving to and from Mississauga:

  • When selecting a lane – one occupied by a truck, one by a car – pick the truck. They go faster.
  • Women drive sports utility vehicles.
  • Sports utility vehicles, by and large, seem occupied by people who can’t drive. Logically deduce at will.
  • Starbucks will soon serve granola. I know this because I tried it. What does it have to do with driving? I ate it in my car.
  • The difference between 7:30 and 7:45 is about three stops on the 410.
  • The difference between 5:00 and 5:10 is about 10 minutes out of the company driveway.
  • Bob McCown rules and makes the drive home entertaining, no matter what Mark says.
  • I am officially the last person alive who knows the left lane is supposed to be for passing, not cruising at the speed you feel comfortable at and to he!! with everyone else.
  • After 45 minutes in the car I have to pee like a racehorse. My commute is one hour each way.

That’s it for now, all true. I’m still researching whether Derringer on Q107 is, indeed, Bob McCown as I have always suspected. I’ll report back with findings.


My attempts to enter the world of Entertainment/Television reporting may be about to take a large step forward. My friend Darren Hewett has launched Uppercut Media, a new one-stop site for news of all sorts. He asked if I would help out and, of course, I’m more than happy to. So, for the next little while, my news bits appear both here and there. There, however, you can get other news too, so I highly recommend adding it to your list of daily stops. It’s in soft-launch right now so forgive any little errors you might find as you make your way through.
Now it’s off to the gym for my daily run. BTW, today’s random Hoff link is, quite possibly, the greatest thing in the history of the interweb.

Today’s Random Links
The Hoff is hooked on a feeling
Play the Missle Maze


Well, the time has come for me to bid adieu once again. I’m leaving my wife to guard the homestead, and that’s not at all frightening. The frightening part comes in who I’ve left to guard the site…

Alex, Kip, and Rob will be taking turns guest blogging from now through Thursday, and Lord knows what they’ll talk about or say. I’ve known two of them for about 20 years now so they might have a few interesting things to say. Give them comments and zonks to make them feel at home.

Since I’m demonstrating all week in London I won’t be near a computer that I know of so this should be the last you hear from me for a bit. Y’all have a good week, and take care!


MGM Execs Gone Wild!

Check it out! Yes, for all you fans of the flesh-baring, rip-roaring, misogynistic good time that is Girls Gone Wild, MGM has cut a deal to bring it to a big screen near you. No longer must you slink off to the back orifices of the local video store to satisfy your unsatiable lust for Mindy from Sellersville, PA and her stuffed chest – Mindy’s coming to the Cineplex! I haven’t yet decided if this is further indication that studios have run out of ideas or that Pacino was right when he said it was the Devil’s time (“I think we could all agree the twentieth century has been entirely mine.” – Devil’s Advocate, 1997).

In other news, my true feelings on the illustrious Segway Human Transporter are now located on my corporate blog at Crafty Puppy. I’ll be posting there fairly regularly, along with Andy and Alex, so bookmark it and pay the odd visit perhaps? The dry wit, insightful commentary, and odd humour will still be present over there – it’ll just be a bit more – corporate.

I love you all!

.. must .. get .. Coke ..

We had the pleasure of having Andy, his wife Catherine, and their new baby girl, Madeline Emma, over to the house for an hour or so on Saturday. We hadn’t seen them in quite some time, and we hadn’t seen the little one yet, so it was great to catch up. Poor Maddie had a cold she’d caught at the doctor’s office and she was quite tired. Still, she’s unbelievably cute and loves to laugh and smile. As Andy noted, she has her Mom’s dimples. He also introduced us to the fact that the baby LOVES one particular noise, then proceeded to make snorting pig noises at her while she giggled out loud and smiled broadly. Here are some pics of the cute little three-month-old:

Madeline Emma Szabo 1 Madeline Emma Szabo 2 Madeline Emma Szabo 3 Madeline Emma Szabo 4

Almost time to bring on the blitz here – as part of the myCaledon website I’ve cut a deal with the folks at to try and bring Internet-ordered delivery to the town of Caledon. Now I just have to convince all the local delivery restaurants to come on board. This town is so full of teenagers and busy moms and dads that I’m pretty sure it’s a great service – it’s just, sometimes, people just don’t understand how powerful a marketing tool the Internet can be. They won’t think twice about spending thousands and thousands on offline items that don’t offer half the ROI that a cheap one-time fee will bring online. Here’s hoping I can convince them..