Pepsi Blew?

My fondness for Coke is documented. Repeatedly. What may not be so well documented is the fact that I think Pepsi tastes like snot. It’s an odd case – Coke is better than Pepsi. But Wild Cherry Pepsi is better than Cherry Coke. So this year, Coke releases the drink I’ve been making myself since childhood, Vanilla Coke, but now it comes premixed and in a pretty can for me. Much better. Kudos to Coke! And not only that, but a source has leaked to me that the new Vanilla Coke has been SO popular that they have fast-tracked the production of a Diet version, something even perpetually popular Cherry Coke never got. That tells you how well this is doing.

So what does Pepsi do to combat? Why, they make their cola blue. Same nasty chemical taste, but blue. Did they learn nothing from Crystal Pepsi?? Stuff looked like a busted-a$$ saline implant pouring into a glass. Even David Lee Roth couldn’t make it look good. IT’S THE FLAVOUR, PEOPLE. Not sure what it takes to make Pepsi realize that food colouring is not the solution to their problems. What’s next, Doritos Plaid? Pepsi Blew indeed…

Need sleep – I’m going golfing for the first time in 15 months and the second time.. well, kinda ever. Now taking bets on how I can injure myself doing this:

-200 retwist ankle
-100 reseparate shoulder
+100 bitten by errant gopher
+300 dimpled balls in forehead
+500 trip on beer cart while admiring Kit Kat bar
+800 impaled on golf club during Chi Chi imitation

Place your bets in the comments, y’all.