Green and Dumb

Would all of those who continue to be angry at my newfound disgust in the Toronto Maple Leafs please put the Kool-Aid down and take a look around you. For those not in the know, the Blow and White are set to announce their signing of Darcy Tucker to a very reasonable $12 million contract over four years, with the final year left as an option to the Leafs. Not bad. Oh, did I forget to mention they gave him a no-trade clause?

Is John Ferguson a tool or a puppet? Hard to say, but what he's not is a great GM building a winner. Has he signed anyone from last year's failed-to-make-the-playoffs staff without handing them a no-trade? All of them older and not improving, now all saddled with the Leafs for four-to-five years. Not like it matters, when I'm one of the few to get off the bus and seek out teams that care about their fans and make what can sometimes be tough decisions for team gain it just means more sell-outs and more justification for their actions.

So enjoy your Maple Leafs as they struggle yet again to make the playoffs only to earn a first or second round exit, should they even get there. They're the same Leafs you'll have for the next four years. Unless, of course, they trade two of their few prospects to bring Gary Roberts back.

Go Sens Go!

Big Star

For a little over a week now I've been the proud owner of a handheld GPS - a Garmin eTrex Legend Cx to be specific. Last year's birthday cash purchase was the well-used iPod 30GB Video with the goal of using it to jog (which I did), and this year's purchase is in the hopes of geocaching and hiking during the spring.

The whole process goes back to my beerbistro dinner with Kip and Shaz last summer when Brent and his girlfriend, Jackie, came to visit from Moncton. During dinner Kip & Shaz mentioned geocaching and I had, sadly, never heard of it at that point. I was in love with the idea of it somewhere between the Belgian Frites and the trip to the Queen's Quay LCBO.

Two times already I've attempted to find a geocache with poor results. The first time, the day after I got it, I tried to find Kip's dad's cache hidden in the old cemetary on Bolton's north hill, but did so dressed in church clothes and black dress shoes on a snowy hill in the sub-freezing temperatures and quickly gave up. Again this weekend Paul and I tried to track one down near City Hall in Toronto but the overcast conditions seemed to wreak havoc on the GPS which directed us with incredible indecision. Hopefully I'll get a chance to try it out a bit more in the near future, and perhaps use it for a pending drive to Buffalo.

During the guy weekend two weeks ago I cracked open my bottle of Unibroue Quelque Chose and warmed it up as instructed to serve up to the gang. Most loved it, and it was quite interesting. Mark in particular seemed to take to it so I've promised him a visit to Premier Gourmet to get some more.

Oh, and before I go - Blues for Pablo made their first unplugged recordings this weekend. Covers of "All the Right Reasons" by The Jayhawks and "Slow Burning Fire" by Skydiggers. They were passable with obvious work to be done, but to get to the point where we're finally playing in unison, singing, and getting it to the form of 0s and 1s means we're getting closer to having something posted on our horribly vacant MySpace page. ;)

Company In My Back

I'm not the sharpest knife in anyone's drawer, but I attempt to do the best with what's available to me. Which brings about two (quick?) stories. First, for years I couldn't stand the Beatles. I refused to listen to them because what I'd heard stunk. But people loved the Beatles, so I would never say they sucked. I knew there was something about them I was missing, and thus the onus was on me to figure out what that something was, rather than pass them off as crappy and move my tunnel vision along to the next thing. Similarly, I remember being presented with a plate of foie gras during a business trip to New Zealand back in 2001; the fattened liver of a duck or goose. People *love* this thing, it's a delicacy. Unfortunately, it remains one of the few things I've tasted I absolutely could not finish. The blame lies not with the fattened liver, but with my taste. Thus I don't indicate that foie gras sucks but that my palate requires maturation.

The moral of the story? Saying Starbucks sucks and Tim Horton's rules really says more about you than your choice of coffee.

But now I must go from provokee to provoker...

The CFL plans to sell the Grey Cup naming rights as soon as before this next season, with the most likely suitors being Tim Horton's, Wendy's, or Rona. Is this at all upsetting to any co-bloggers around here?

Mobile Part 3

I'm not going to punch a gift horse in the wickets but that morning drive seemed somewhat uneventful compared to what was being warned. Oddly, it appeared to be more the responsibility of people driving intelligently and responsibly and less about preparation as snow removal had either not begun or was in the early stages for the tour from Bolton to the 410/401 interchange. I have a feeling a good 30-50% of the people who are normally accompanying on my morning drive decided to stay home, and those that took the challenge on did so with two hands on the wheel and a whole lot of patience. Good to see.

Lots of talk on the FAN590 about shootouts with some morning team members (*cough*Landry*cough*) continuing to have a strong dislike for the regular season method of settling NHL conflicts. I, personally, continue to have love for shootouts and strong dislike for awarding points to losers. It's had me thinking lately about what I deem is the optimal solution to NHL game pointing:

Three 20-minute periods
One five-minute 4-on-4 overtime
One five-minute 3-on-3 overtime
Shootout

This delivers 10 minutes of exciting overtime hockey featuring the fast-paced scoring folks you'd expect on a power play, with the shootout being the last resort to rid the game of ties altogether. My optimal pointing system is one point for a win and none for a loss, but I understand this is stressful to the masses. How about three points for a regulation win, two points for an overtime win, one point for a shootout win, and zero points for the loser, no matter when they lost?

Oh, and fire Gary Bettman. Hire a smart Canadian CEO with a love for hockey and a reputation in business. But fire Bettman. Live. On Hockey Night in Canada.

Redemption

So it looks like after seeing my initial workload of three programs increased by one a couple weeks into my tenure at Ingram I've now been handed the reigns of a major project here. The company is launching an entire new division accompanied by a new line of products and it appears I'll be spearheading the planning, branding, and marketing of it. It's precisely the kind of challenge I was looking for when I decided to leave the home office and I'm ecstatic to take it on. I know the "new" corporate Rick Jessup is a surprise to those who know me best but let's just say that I've learned a lot since the first corporate RJ of CryptoLogic. Those were bad times, and these are better.

I am addicted to 'Robot Chicken'. Like, completely. I have to watch it every morning with breakfast. Best segment yet was the one starring Charlie Brown.

I'm also readdicted to Wilco's catalogue of CDs, most notably the 'Kicking Television' double live album I'd really never listened to after buying. I've taken to plugging in my headphones and listening to CDs or WDVX at work. Great for concentration, but makes me look like an idiot when I fail to notice someone behind me talking to me.

Today's weather is unfair. I mean, it's been cold lately, that's no secret. But for those others who reside in the GTA like me, are we not being provided with a little something extra out there today? It just feels so much worse, temperature wise, than it's been.

Hell is Chrome

I believe I speak for all guys when I ask:

What in the name of the baby Jesus are women doing at ATM machines?

Seriously, I just don't get this at all. I got my first debit card when I was about 15, and since that first trip to the machine, I've known how it works. You saddle up, place card in, punch in pin code, select the best of the fast cash options, your account, take money, leave. Total process: 45 seconds. If you need to make a deposit, add an additional 45 seconds. I pity the fool who walks into the ATM section to find them all in use by the fairer gender; we have no idea how long they've been there, but there's one thing we do know. By the time we finally get to use a machine, upon leaving, two of those three ladies will still be there.

Seriously, ladies, what are you doing?!

I also hate pants.

Today's Random Links
The secret attack that almost brought down the net.
Mr Picassohead.. good times..

Frail

I believe, according to Men's Health, that the average person gains 20 pounds a year when beginning an office job. I can see why already. I'm pleased to report that my attempts to continue eating right have continued regardless of the new direction in life, eating smaller amounts, six times a day, whole grains, vegetables, blah blah blah. I think the difference is that, while I was home, I never quite realized how often I actually went jogging. I haven't stepped on a scale but I all around feel pudgier and more lethargic, and so it was that irritation that saw me triple layer some clothes and go for a 5k run on Tuesday night.

o_O

About 1km in I found a short-cut through a wooded area near my house and took off like a bullet to get home. I was so cold I stood there for a minute trying to thaw, then made my way upstairs to change. Most of my body was bright red - it looked like I'd been jumped by Jimmy Snuka and repeatedly slapped about the body. Not good. So now I've begun the process of securing winter running gear from Running Room - likely at a cost of near $300. The cost if I don't do it appears to be far worse, so I'm willing to try. My annual St Pat's 5k is about a month away, so I need to get in shape fast.

Somewhat lost in my inability to keep up on the news lately was Labatt bidding $201M for Lakeport. The only thing that would thrill me about this is to see every single beer on The Beer Store's top 10 board be foreign-owned, since Lakeport is currently the only Canadian-owned item in their top 10. I only pray that Labatt won't ruin the flavour.

LOOLOOLOOLOOOLOOOOOOLLLLOOL

Dead Man (Carry Me)

So now I'm 33. I just keep getting older and older. I'm not enjoying it.

This weekend was indeed another Network Wars - titled 7.1 as we've lost track of how many we've had now, probably roughly four per year for three years now. The boys did a good job of ignoring my impending birth anniversary, going so far as to inform the Mandarin folks that it was Paul's birthday and not mine. Hilarity ensued.

Mary got stuck at the house on Friday and was kind enough to provide the gang with waffles on Saturday morning, as well as chocolate cookies. I tried my hand at my new healthy pancakes and they were also well-received. They're made with stone-ground wheat flour, yogourt, irish oats, maple syrup, and an egg. Actually all good ingredients, and when fried in a non-stick pan you even avoid those extra butter calories. The weekend was a mix of some computer gaming, some Guitar Hero, and thanks to Mike, some Wii gaming. The nunchuk controller is as much fun as advertised with tennis, bowling, and golf being the games of the day.

Mark is wrong, Mandarin is not the devil. People just make bad decisions. I ate more than anyone and felt fine after as I ate quality foods, not deep fried crap. I've come to enjoy Mandarin as a place to go not to gorge on crap but to graze on greens, sushi, high-protein meats, etc.. And ice cream. And maybe cake.

Thankfully they musn't have processed my papers here at the office yet as my name failed to make the birthday list, so I made it through the day without my co-workers finding out. After a long day at work that had been preceded by a weekend during which I rarely get any proper sleep, exercise, or water I was pretty tired. My wife kindly had a cake waiting for me when I returned, a copy of Alias: Season 5, some dark-chocolate cherries, and my choice of Pizza Pizza order. Thin crust, whole grain, with chicken, broccoli, and caramelized onions for those who may be curious.

Back to the grindstone! I should be working, not typing.. later..

Purple Rain...

I think maybe its time to get this discussion off the Zonkboard and into a blog.

Its seems that for once I am one of the few that thought the Super Bowl was indeed interesting to watch. This is somewhat ironic as not one hour before the game I was discussing over dinner how much I hate the champion game. Now I did miss the first half of the game because I was returning from Toronto via Hamilton (had to take Paul back to school), but I did watch the 3rd quarter and most of the 4th. Here’s what I thought of the game. Both teams actually played very well. The Bears defense lived up to all the expectations and played well for most of the game. They created multiple turnovers and hassled the Colts offence for most of the game. I suspect it would have been a much tighter game had they not spent so much time on the field. The Bears offence, although not great, did manage to make some great players and moved the ball effectively for 3 quarters, had Grossman not thrown that pick in the fourth quarter I actually think the Bears could have won. The Colts on the other hand started slow, but got into a great rhythm by the second half. Manning made some great players, but even greater was their running game. Both Addia and Rhodes played amazing and really were the stars of the Colts offence. The Colts defense played strong all game and managed to stop the Bears offence when it counted. Overall it I definitely found the game interesting.

So maybe I’m one of the few out there that didn’t watch the game for the commercials. In fact I care very little for them. I now await Rick’s response about how football is boring and the only good thing about the game is the commercials.

Oh and this past weekend was Network Wars 7.1, but I think I will let Rick take a stab at producing a more colourful summary of the events that unfolded. He’s always been better at it than me. I will say this. The Mandarin is officially the devil.